You are attracted to their “brokenness”. When we are attracted to the way we perceive one to be broken, we need to take notice. First of all, we recognize that we are seeing their mental illness as something that is flawed about them. Second of all, we must recognize that instead of encouraging this person to seek help and treatment they need, we believe we can take control of their lives. Lastly, being attracted to someone’s mental illness instead of who they are as a person outside of their mental illness usually indicates remaining insecurity in us. We believe that we can only be loved within our brokenness and that it takes someone else who is broken to do so. Recovery is a process of putting the pieces back together again and learning how to love ourselves, and others, as whole human beings.
You believe you can heal each other. Relationships are powerful things but they are not the work of psychiatrists, medical doctors, and licensed therapists. Two depressions don’t equal non-depression. Sadly, most of the time, two diagnoses of depression can result in substance abuse, physical abuse, or more.
You think your fights are special. Without treatment, therapy, and learning how to regulate your emotions, it is likely you get into a lot of fights. Sometimes your fights are normal, but sometimes they get physical and violent. You might assign blame to passion, devotion, or security. The truth is, violent fights are a symptom of severe dysfunction getting out of control.
You enable their substance abuse. Mental illness when gone untreated usually finds its relief through substance abuse. If your partner abuses drugs and alcohol it is likely you will eventually join or enable them to continue acting in self destructive ways.
You don’t get yourself help when you’re with them. One of the major warning signs for being in a relationship with someone who is also suffering from mental illness is your self-care. When your self-care gets turned into caring entirely for them, you are putting yourself at risk.
If you or a loved one are in need of treatment for mental health disorder issues, call Aurora Recovery Centre today. As a certified dual diagnosis treatment centre we are able to provide care for both substance abuse and mental health disorder issues. For more information on our programs call 844-515-STOP.