Whoever you thought you were during your addiction was a lie. The real, true you is deep within yourself, buried underneath the lies you built over time.
At the beginning of recovery, especially without finding a spiritual compass, things may seem bland. This may make you bland, but eventually the colours of your life return allowing you to embrace your true self and live a fulfilling life. Though the road to recovery will be emotional, it will be uncomfortable. But it will be worth it.
Identify the issues
Reflect on past experiences that made you comfortable and pinpoint why they did. Then, do the same with situations or activities that made you feel uncomfortable. Once you build a foundation of being able to see why or why not something made you feel uneasy, make a list of future situations that could happen in your daily life.
Find your center
Make a list of what makes you feel at peace and happy. They could be of different situations, hobbies, interests, memories, phrases or saying thoughts. This will allow you to put these thoughts to use when you’re feeling anxious or uncomfortable by grounding you, taking you to your happy place, and reminding you that uncomfortable situations only last a few moments.
Find a balance
Remember that life consists of unfamiliar situations—no matter what. If you’re enjoying yourself having a conversation, or out with friends when something happens that causes an awkward moment, remember to use your list to calm down. Then, see how the rest of the time brought you joy and comfort.
Set goals and celebrate
Before going to an event that you know will make you feel uneasy, set a goal for yourself. It could be as simple as introducing yourself to someone new. Once you complete the goal(s), celebrate your victory by doing something you love.
These tips may feel easier said than done, but we need to learn to embrace our fears and make them work for us, not against us. Make it a priority to discover who you truly are.